


The Power of Mind

by SkylarUnicorn



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Tommy Ratliff (Musician)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Confusion, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mental Institutions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-07
Updated: 2016-01-17
Packaged: 2018-04-08 00:26:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4283673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkylarUnicorn/pseuds/SkylarUnicorn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tommy is the happiest man on Earth - Adam told him he loved him and now they live together. But he wakes up in what appears to be a mental hospital, and the life he has with Adam seems to be just an illusion created by his mind...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> No beta, so read at your own responsibility and if you're scared of mistakes don't read at all

Tommy was running, as fast as he could. He was scared, so scared... They were going to catch him soon, he knew it, but he kept running...

“Tommy! Tommy, wake up!”

Tommy opened his eyes, which turned out to be a lot harder than he expected. Someone must have turned on the light, because he had to squint.

He looked around and saw that in fact the light was coming from the window. Apparently it was the middle of the day. He was lying on a couch in a room that after closer inspection turned out to be Adam's living room.

“Good afternoon,” said Adam.

“Adam”, mumbled Tommy in response.

“You remember my name, that's good,” laughed the singer. “After the amount of alcohol you consumed last night I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't remember your own.”

“Shut up and get me some water please,” groaned Tommy. The pounding in his head confirmed Adam's words.

Adam laughed again, but went to the kitchen. Tommy briefly wondered what he was doing in his house, but after a second it all came back to him. A few weeks before Adam finally told him he loved him. Tommy was the happiest man in the world. They moved in together, that's why he was there. Even though he was hungover, Tommy felt warmth in his heart.

“Tommy! Tommy, wake up!”

That was strange. He could swear that someone was calling his name, telling him to wake up. But he wasn't sleeping so why would someone...

Tommy opened his eyes and stared at the white ceiling.

“Oh good, you finally woke up,” said a voice to his right.

Tommy turned his head in the voice's direction. It must have come from the tall, blonde man in a white doctor's coat. His name tag said “Mark”.

“What... where am I? What is going on?”

“You're in your room, Tommy. In the Getwell hospital where you came for help,” explained the doctor.

“What hospital? Help with what? Where is Adam and how the fuck did I get here?”

“Tommy,” doctor Mark looked sympathetic. “Adam isn't real. That's why you came here. You've been having hallucinations. You're most likely suffering from some form of schizophrenia.”

“What the hell are you talking about?!” Tommy looked around the room. Besides the hospital bed he was sitting on and a bedside table next to it, there was a window with bars in it, a desk, a chair and two doors, both of them open, one leading to a bathroom and the other to a hallway. To Tommy's surprise, he was wearing a white hospital gown.

“What... I didn't come here, I'm not crazy! How can you tell me he's not real? I've just been in his house, I've known him for years, I played in his band! If you don't believe me there are like millions of videos to prove it, just go look!”

“Tommy,” the doctor spoke slowly, like he was talking to a four-year-old. “Adam doesn't exist. You played in a local band for the last few years. You started having hallucinations a few weeks ago, and you came here for help.”

“But... he was in American Idol! In 2009. You can easily check!”

“Okay then,” sighed Mark. “Come with me. We'll check.”

Tommy jumped out of his bed. Finally he had a chance to prove to this crazy man that he was wrong. How could he not have heard about Adam Lambert? Especially after the tour with Queen.

The doctor led Tommy out the door, to the hallway. The black and white marble floor was cold under his bare feet and white walls made him feel a bit claustrophobic. Everything looked the same, to his left and right were rows of white doors. Tommy guessed those were patients' rooms. He shivered.

At the end of the hallway there was a wide door, which led to what looked like a reception or waiting room, a secretary sitting behind a desk, couches and tables with leaflets and stacks of magazines on them. They turned left and suddenly the doctor stopped.

“Why did we stop walking?” asked Tommy.

“We're here,” the doctor pointed to a computer standing in front of them. “Now show me your Adam.”

Tommy almost ran to the computer. Now he was going to prove he wasn't insane and get out of this nuthouse. He pressed the button and tapped his feet impatiently, looking at the rows of letters and digits on the screen.

“Now you're going to see...” Tommy found Youtube, typed “Adam Lambert” and pressed enter.

“Wha...” he stared at the screen in disbelief. “No matches?! But... no, that's not possible.” He tried adding “Queen” and “American Idol” to his search, but the result was the same. Google and Wikipedia also never heard about any Adam Lambert. Same as Twitter and Facebook. There were no pictures, not even a single mention of his name.

Tommy remembered that last night he got really drunk and tweeted about him and Adam making out. He wanted to post a picture, but passed out before he could do it. He logged in to Twitter, but the tweet wasn't there. Instead there were a lot of tweets about some band he supposedly worked with, called “The Storms”. That was ridiculous. Tommy never even heard of that band.

“He couldn't have just disappeared,” Tommy turned to the doctor.

“He didn't. He never existed in the first place. Your mind created an illusion you believed in. Illusions like that can seem very realistic, but you see the truth yourself – Adam isn't real.”

“But... last night... I saw him! And this morning... I...”

“You haven't been here long enough for your medication to start working. But don't worry, with time you'll stop hallucinating, there are huge chances you'll be able to return to normal life after a while. We'll help you. Everything will be okay.”

Tommy couldn't think of anything he could say. He felt like someone hit him in the head. His mind was numb. Not even looking at the doctor, he got up and went to his room.

Adam didn't exist. Their life together, all the details he remembered from it, were fake. The first time he saw Adam and the only thing he could think was that he had never seen a more beautiful person in his entire life. The AMAs kiss and the huge scandal. Glam Nation Tour. How his heart was torn to pieces when Adam was with Sauli. The next tour. The first time Adam told him he loved him. The first time they had sex, when Tommy was scared because he had never done it with another man and Adam took care of him, making it one of the best nights in his life. It was all fake, all made up by his sick mind. He curled up on the bed, sobbing.

He didn't know how much time passed, but eventually doctor Mark brought him something to eat and some pills. Tommy ate a sandwich and swallowed his medication like a robot. Soon his eyelids started feeling really heavy, and sitting up became very difficult. As soon as his head touched the pillow, he fell asleep.


	2. Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it took me a while to write the next one, but here it is XD I'm sorry about potential mistakes, if you find any, please let me know and I'll correct them. Enjoy :)

“Here, drink this,” said Adam, holding a glass of water.

“What...”

Tommy jumped off the couch and looked around. He was no longer in a mental institution and Adam who was standing in front of him, baffled, seemed very real. To make sure of it, Tommy touched his arm, which only made Adam look at him strangely.

“Are you still drunk?” asked the singer.

“No, I just... nevermind, I'm okay. Better than okay, actually,” Tommy grinned.

“Okaaaaay,” Adam handed him the glass. “I think you should drink this and sit down.”

Tommy started sipping the water, thinking. Was the hospital a dream? But how long could it have taken Adam to get a glass of water, one minute, maybe two. He couldn't have fallen asleep in that time, could he? It must have been some strange side effect of alcohol, he decided finally, mostly to put his own mind at ease.

They spent the rest of the day watching TV, eating pizza and cuddling. In the evening they went to bed and there was more cuddling. Life is perfect, thought Tommy as he fell asleep in Adam's arms.

Tommy opened his eyes and stared at the white ceiling. He had a feeling bordering on certainty that exactly the same thing had happened to him before. He looked to the left and to his horror saw doctor Mark standing there, a broad smile on his face.

“Good morning, Thomas. Did you sleep well?”

Tommy cringed inside. The only person who called him Thomas was his father when he was angry with him.

“I was just...” he started saying, but then thought better of it. The man thought he was insane already, telling him about how he had just spent the day with Adam was certainly not a good idea. “I was just about to get up,” he finished.

“I don't suppose you had any strange dreams last night, did you?”

“No, I don't remember any dreams.”

“Good,” it seemed impossible, but the doctor's smile became even broader. “Here is your breakfast,” he pointed to a tray with two sandwiches and a cup of tea on it, “and here are your pills. Take them before breakfast.”

Tommy's intuition told him he shouldn't take anything from this man, but doctor Mark was staring at him expectantly, so he quickly put the pills in his mouth, hiding them under his tongue, took a sip of water from the bottle he had on his bedside table and pretended to swallow them.

“After breakfast you have therapy, as usual. You don't need to hurry, when you finish eating, just come to my office.”

The doctor left. Tommy spit out the pills and closed his eyes, trying not to cry. It was happening again. If it was a dream, he wanted to wake up. He pinched his arm to check, but it hurt for real. What was going on? Did someone add something to his drink when he was out with Adam? But he never heard of any drug that would cause hallucinations, then stop working and then start again if he didn't take another dose. He tried to control his emotions and focus. There were a few possibilities. One was that Adam had drugged him, but he immediately dismissed that idea as ridiculous. Another possibility was that someone kidnapped him and locked him here, trying to convince him he was insane. But why would anyone do that? And would it even be possible to erase all traces of Adam's existence from the internet? Unless someone used some advanced program to block searches containing any information about him on the computers in this building. That didn't seem likely though. The last option, and although he hated to admit it the most likely one, was that he was really mentally ill and had imagined Adam.

He got up and flushed the pills in the toilet. Maybe he was really insane, but he wasn't going to give up on the love of his life so easily. He had to get out of there and see for himself if Adam existed. But to be able to do that he had to pretend he's cooperating with the doctor so no one would watch him too closely.

After breakfast Tommy went to doctor Mark's office as instructed. The whole visit was boring and consisted mostly of filling some tests and answering random questions. The doctor also asked him if he still believed Adam was real and Tommy answered that no, he checked on the computer yesterday and since there was no trace of Adam, what the doctor said must have been true. He also added a bit about how he wanted to get better and get back to normal life, and the doctor assured him it would be possible very soon.

As he was leaving, he caught a glimpse of a business card lying on the desk. It had the doctor's name and the name of the hospital on it, and below was the address. Tommy had to stop himself from shouting “yes!”, because it was just a few blocks from Adam's house – he could even walk there.

Then Tommy had some free time, so he wandered around the building, trying to create a map in his head. The whole place seemed very strange. Some patients were watching TV in what seemed to be a living room. He saw a few cameras, but what he assumed was the front door wasn't behind some metal bars like he expected. What was more, behind the receptionist in the hall he saw a cabinet with many keys, and under one of them “front door” printed on a piece of paper. This didn't seem like a way to make sure no patients would run away, but maybe the doctors assumed that in their state they were not capable of figuring out the way to escape, or maybe they were just too drugged. The important thing was Tommy now had a plan. He only had to wait until it got dark.

Doctor Mark came to say good night and make sure Tommy would take his pills in the evening. Tommy pretended to fall asleep, and the doctor left the room, satisfied. He waited until he could no longer hear the footsteps in the doorway, flushed the pills and waited a little longer to make sure that both the doctor and the receptionist left for the night.

Trying to be quiet just in case someone was in the building, Tommy sneaked out of his room. The door wasn't even locked. Getting out of the building was very easy too, almost as if someone wanted him to be able to escape. He didn't waste time thinking about it though; he had to get to Adam as soon as possible.

Tommy chose streets with as little traffic as possible, because a person walking around in a hospital gown would surely attract a lot of attention. Someone could call the police... why was he wearing a hospital gown anyway? Maybe it was a standard in psychiatric hospitals, he didn't know; he only ever saw them in horror movies.

Stopping in front of what looked like Adam's house, he realized he didn't think this part of the plan through. Should he just knock on the door?

His problem was solved by a car that pulled up in front of the house. Two men got out, one looking very similar to Brad, and the other one...

“Adam!” screamed Tommy, tears of joy running down his cheeks. “So it wasn't true, they lied to me, you're real, Adam...”

Then he realized something was wrong. Adam didn't look happy to see him – he was staring at him like he thought Tommy was insane. Tommy walked up to him and asked quietly “Adam?”

“My name is not Adam, it's Brandon,” said the man who looked like Adam. “You must have confused me with someone.”

“But... but... you look like him, you are Adam, I played in your band, don't you remember?”

“I don't know what you're talking about, I never played in any band.”

“No, you sing...”

“I don't even like singing,” Adam-Brandon's expression turned sympathetic. “Maybe you want me to call someone so they can come and get you. You seem like you need some rest.”

“No, this is... Brad,” Tommy turned to the other man. “You must remember me.”

“I'm Kegan, and I've never seen you before in my life, I'm sorry.”

“I... no, this can't be real. It can't be real!”

Tommy turned around and started running. He didn't know where he was going and didn't care. So the doctor was right all along. He was insane. He must have seen Brandon somewhere and his sick mind created an illusion. But why did it hurt so much then? He felt as if his heart had been ripped out of his chest and shuttered to a million pieces.

**Author's Note:**

> Don't worry, more coming soon ;)


End file.
